Hate

Hate.

That’s the one thing I feel

Hate.

But it's not for him

Its for me

I hate myself

I hate myself for not noticing

I hate that I found him

I hate he did this

Hate

I hate that I don’t hate him

I hate how I feel

I hate weeping my eyes out

I hate that I needed my cousin to hold my hand

I hate how much my uncle reminds me of him

Hate

I hate how he hid it

Trapping his bubbling feelings inside

I hate we never noticed

All 4 of us

Now 3

I hate how late I came

How I couldn’t save him

How he looked when I found him

We texted him

Unresponded texts still live in his phone

I thought I could be strong and make a new beginning

I was wrong